Ascendicus the Failure

Ascendicus the Failure was a Brute equipped with a Jump Pack who fought on the side of the Covenant Loyalists during the Human-Covenant War. He was present during the Battle of Earth when Johnny led an offensive against the Covenant force occupying Voi. Ascendicus was on patrol one day when he saw Johnny approaching his pack on a stolen Chopper. He alerted the pack's War Chieftain, but the Chieftain merely laughed at him, claiming that "absolutely nothing can penetrate our defences" in the typical manner of the overzealous failure leader. Ascendicus therefore attempted to attack Johnny alone, and Jump-Packed over to his position. However, unlike the Elite Jump Packs, which were of course positioned on their back like any normal jetpack, the Brute Jump Packs were (for some reason) positioned on the front of the Brute so Ascendicus was sent flying backwards over the edge of a cliff.

Alas, he thought, I can use my Jump Pack to escape! But apparently the Jump Packs only work for jumping, they don't actually make the Brute fly at all. Rather annoyed at these obvious design flaws, Ascendicus the Failure sulked for a while as he plummeted to his death, and wondered whether it was even worth joining the Covenant the first place.